I sigh and fold my arms over my chest, looking around the park. It's not as busy as I thought it would be with such nice weather out, though there are a couple of people nearby having a picnic. A little further down, there is a large group of boys playing football. And here we are, going in circles.
"I thought you liked me," I mumble, a small amount of water brimming in my eyes. I don't allow it to spill over, not just yet. "You told me that you wanted this to be different from the other relationships you have had."
"You are different," Rhodes quickly interrupts me. He looks scared, probably because I'm about to cry in public, and that could result in some embarrassment for him.
"But you have held me to the same standard as them. I'm trying so hard to be what you want me to be, and I just don't think I can do it." I'm exhausted, chasing this ideal that I feel he wants from me. Being okay with his mood swings, dealing with this contract nonsense, not being able to be honest with those around me about our relationship, is wearing me down, and I can only imagine it getting worse if I keep going.
"Hey..." Rhodes trails off, but places his hands on my upper arms so that I focus my eyes on him. I don't want to. I know that as soon as I look at him and see a slight look of sadness, I will back down. It's my people-pleasing nature, it's within me, and I just can't brush this under the rug.
"I don't want you to change. I like you. I mean that, I like you in a completely different way than I've liked anyone before. I don't want you to change."
"That's bullshit, Rhodes," I blurt out and wipe up the small amount of liquid that has leaked out of my eyes. "Just last night you told me to adhere to what the contract says. If you really didn't want to change me, then you wouldn't have a list of comprehensive rules for me to follow."
He frowns down at me; he knows I've made a good point. "The contract—it's just... it's just a thing I've always had in these sorts of relationships. It's been like a sort of insurance policy for me, just so my life won't be blown to shreds if things go wrong." Now I'm the one frowning; why would he need someone to sign a contract to promise him something like that?