"Relationships are never easy, hon, welcome to the world of dating," I hear Poppy say from her seated position on the floor. I close my eyes for a minute; I'm exhausted all of a sudden.
"Did you go through the same sort of thing when you started doing this?" I already know the answer to my question. Poppy is carefree about relationships and sex; she's not frigid and uptight like I am.
"I wish I could tell you yes, but no, I didn't. That being said, I wasn't attracted to Adan when we first met either. It was only a couple of weeks in when we started getting to know each other better and having sex that I actually felt a connection with him. You're lucky in a way that there's already an attraction there. You have more to build on."
"This was only supposed to be a quick way for me to make money, why am I taking it so seriously?" I groan and ridicule myself. I feel like I'm almost sabotaging myself when it comes to romantic situations like this. I make things way more difficult than they need to be. Poppy is silent for a moment before I feel my bed sag in the middle as she sits down next to my head.
"Because you might actually be feeling something real for him, and that's a vulnerable and scary thing for you." Poppy knows me very well, almost as well as I know myself. It's true that I haven't had much action in the romance department, really any action at all. And because this is all happening so fast, and in such awkward circumstances, it's understandable that I feel a little scared about it.
I open my eyes to see Poppy looking down at me sympathetically. She's since tied her hair up into a high ponytail, keeping her hair from falling onto my face.
"What the hell do I do?" She gives me a gentle smile before she replies.
"I say you put yourself a little bit out of your comfort zone, which I know you've been doing a lot lately, by the way, very proud of you. Just try being a little bit less guarded, let him in a little bit. But trust your gut; if something doesn't sit right with you then call him out on it and figure it out between the two of you."