I turned the lamp on my desk as evening fell. I was alone in my studio. Maisy and the sales assistants had gone home hours ago. I should too, but… I lingered. I was only half-heartedly working on the design in front of me. Instead, I was thinking about the request Dylan had made a few days ago: to come back to the pack. I’d known the request was coming for weeks. But it hadn’t made it any easier to hear. I’d told him I’d think about it, and I was. Incessantly.
We’d had a lovely time a few days ago as a real family on Fern’s birthday. I loved watching my daughter play party games with her friends and bask for the first time in the knowledge that she had her mom and dad there. And I enjoyed basking in Dylan’s attention too. Thoughts of the way we’d made love that night, tenderly, lovingly, knowing that we were part of a family we’d made together, had been beautiful. The way he’d caressed me with such tenderness and reverence had made me feel like a Moon Goddess.
Concerning our extended family too, Dylan’s request to come back with him to the pack seemed to make sense. Our moving back to Seattle would make my dad’s life so much easier. I knew he’d been willing to relocate to Berlin for his granddaughter and me, but I knew, too, he was happy where he was in Seattle. He’d had a whole lifetime there, and the house he lived in was full of memories of my late mom and of my childhood. Over the last few weeks, I’d told my dad that Dylan and I were making a go of our relationship here in Berlin, and he’d been pleased for me, promising to come out and see us soon.
Besides my dad, we’d have Dylan’s parents back in our lives too. I knew things could be rocky at first, given how Dylan’s choosing to pursue me meant that he’d gone against the old Alpha’s wishes. But I knew Chris and Heather were good people. And I was sure once they’d met Fern, their granddaughter, they’d be pleased to have us back in their lives. The idea of my daughter having such an extended network of family after having just me for so long seemed like something in favor of the move too.
Yet, the idea of going back wasn’t all roses. I looked around at the vast, airy studio. I’d withdrawn a lot from Dylan over the last couple of days, hiding in my work and pulling a few late nights while he spent time with Fern. As much as I wanted to be with my mate, I felt as if I was already grieving for the business I’d have to let go of.
I stared around at the long white tables where final prototypes lay. The interns who had now been here for the summer months were working on their final pieces. They’d be finished up in a few days. Their questions echoed through my head, and their eager energy seemed to dance in the studio, which had been their learning space and the incubator for their creativity. I loved being part of that process and couldn’t imagine not having it in my life. My gaze fell on the mannequin draped with a dress that Maisy was altering. My heart throbbed painfully. I pictured Maisy’s careful movements and heard her bright voice and easy-going humor. It must have been almost nine months that I’d worked with my assistant designer, and I felt another pang in my chest as I contemplated not working alongside her.
Just then, my phone rang, and I dreaded it being Dylan checking in and asking when I was coming home.
I glanced at the caller ID and saw it was Bert. I’d long since patched things up with my old friend since he’d betrayed my secret about Fern to Dylan. It was hard to stay angry at him when he’d helped bring my mate and me back together and indirectly given us such joy over the last few weeks.